Saturday, June 2, 2012

Life is a Battlefield

     Weeks like this one really kick me in the rear.   This has been a week long battle between me and my arthritis and unfortunately, arthritis is winning.   I have been nearly bed ridden since Tuesday morning.  I move from the bed to the recliner and that is about the extent of movement I can tolerate because the pain is so severe.  I went to the doctor but only got to see the PA who thought it was probably muscular and suggested I use heat.  After dealing with this for 30 years I don't think this is muscular.  I'm worried about what it might be.

     This morning, I really thought I was better.  For the first time since Monday I got up and cooked a decent meal for my husband.   Big mistake.  This afternoon I am suffering horribly with excruciating pain.   Looks like I am back to square one.  

     I've always been a big advocate for a positive attitude getting you through anything.  I've managed to control my depression through pain, surgeries and life changing limitations, accepting that this is my cross to bear in life and trying to find the bright side.  Weeks like this really challenge my strength.   

     If the disc in my spine keep deteriorating and I end up facing more back surgery, my strength will really be tested.  I'm not sure I can handle any more.  I've already had 5 and with each one comes more nerve damage and more arthritis pain.  Enough is enough.

     But I will get through it.  Like I always do.  I guess I'm just a little scared.  I'm not writing this to make anyone feel sorry for me.  I don't need or want sympathy.  Everyone has their own cross to bear.  I think I just needed to write this for my own therapy.  To let it all out.  To vent.  As the saying goes, "This too shall pass".

     Music always helps so please enjoy one of my favorites.


Until next time...that's my view.
Kat

32 comments:

  1. Big {{{hugs}}} to you, Karen. So sorry that you're having to deal with so much pain. Glad that you are writing about it -- I think it's much more painful to keep it inside. Hope you have some easing of it soon. ♥

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    1. Thank you for your concern Connie, and the hugs. The support of friends is the best medicine I have found.

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  2. I'm sure it'll pass, but knowing that doesn't really make this minute all that much easier. I hope relief comes sooner rather than later and that this is your last bad bout. {{{gentle hugs}}}

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    1. Thank you Beth. You would think I would be used to this by now but this has been the worst spell I've had for a while. The support of friends always makes me feel better though.

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  3. Aw Kat ... I hear you! I battle severe arthritis so I know that story too well. Then I fell last week and badly sprained both ankles! Hard enough to stay off one foot ... But two? So healing is much slower than I would like. Feels like I'm forever complaining though my intent is simply to journal the reality of life in this body! Praying you feel better soon!

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    1. Beth, I am so sorry you are dealing with all that right now. It certainly is no fun. Don't worry about complaining. You and I both know it helps to let it out. I have found that blogging is very therapeutic. Thanks for your support and I hope you feel better soon.

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  4. I'm sorry you're hurting. You are so strong though and I admire that you're battling this and doing your best to be positive.

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    1. Thank you so much Dancer. It certainly helps to have great friends supporting me.

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  5. Pain relief coming soon, I hope. Your strength and fortitude is remarkable and you have all the love and support I can send cyberly your way. Hang tough and take good drugs. (((hugs))) ♥

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  6. Thank you Jo. I wouldn't be as strong if it weren't for the support of wonderful friends. I'll take all the hugs I can get!

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  7. Oh my gosh Kat i am so so sorry to hear this. It really upsets me. But hope some positive vibes come from all your bloggers and make you feel better. You are a strong person and I admire you. Please do take care and rest. Thanks for tagging me. Will do it.

    www.thoughtsofpaps.com

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    1. Thank you so much Paps. The support of great friends like you really does help. Thanks for taking the tag. I'll be anxious to read it.

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  8. I hope you are feeling better. ((((((hugs))))).

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    1. Thank you Suzy. All these warm hugs have really helped. I am feeling better.

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  9. I am so sorry to learn you are suffering. My grandma suffered with rheumatoid arthritis until her death. I have suffered with back pain and took care of my mom while she lost her battle with bone cancer. They all came with tremendous pain. All you can do is take one minute, hour, day at a time and do the best you can. My thoughts and prayers for strength and perseverance are with you. It is a hard road you are going through. You must already be pretty strong God never gives you more than you can bear. I pray you find some relief soon!!

    Kathy
    http://gigglingtruckerswife.blogspot.com

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    1. Thank you so much Kathy. I am feeling some better and the support of great friends like you has helped. I'm sorry you had to go through so much also.

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  10. I am so sorry! I really hope you feel better soon. Pain that leaves you motionless is so tough! *Cyber hugs*

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    1. Thank you so much Britney. I am feeling better. I appreciate you stopping by.

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  11. Oh, Kat, go ahead and vent. Sometimes that's all we can do to get through to the next day. And that phrase, "This too shall pass," I know well from my own mother who has been saying it all her life. It still helps her keep going. Always good to see you hear, anyway, if you're looking for a distraction and company:)

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    1. Thank you Sandra. I love being here with all my blogging friends. It does help tremendously!

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  12. Sorry you are in pain. My older sis had back pain till surgery. It was hard to see her pain. Hope you feel better soon.

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    1. Thank you Laura. I hope your sister is doing well.

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  13. Life is a battlefield and the winners are the ones who face the war with positive energy and the ability to lift others. You seem to have both those traits. I hope this week is a better one.

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    1. That is so nice of you to say Jewels. Thank you so much. My blogger friends are like sunshine to my day. :D

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  14. Outlasting the current storm sometimes feels like an impossible task. I know you know this. I know this. A lot of us know this. Hoping for the best.

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    1. Yes, so many of us know all too well. Thank you Amy. I am feeling some better. Hope things are well for you.

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  15. Hang in there. I've been through the back issues and am having a different sort of surgery this week. I tell ya, I swear by my Sergio Lube copper and magnetic bracelet.

    http://joycelansky.blogspot.com

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    1. Thank you Joyce. I tried a magnetic ankle bracelet once. Didn't really help much. Thanks for the suggestion though.

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  16. My mother would always help us ge through the pain by saying, "this time tomorrow, you'll feel better". Of course, that wasn't always the case, however it ws the HOPE that was associated with it that helped. Here's HOPING that each tomorrow finds you feeling a little better than today.

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  17. Kat,writing to vent your feelings is therapy.I've tried it,it works.*Hugs*
    Yes,believing 'This too will pass' is very powerful.

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    1. Thank you Laila. I love all the warm hugs I've been getting.

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  18. Back pain is a huge part of my life also. So I understand. I am lucky, I haven't had to have any surgeries and so far mine is controlled with some meds and doctor appointments. I had to many injuries working in a nursing home for 12 years so wore out part of my back and right shoulder.
    I hope you feel better Kat. Write and vent and take care of yourself.
    Blessings!!

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